Setting Appropriateness & Romantic Success: New Study Insights

Place where romantic interaction occurs can significantly influence its perception and success. A new study published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin found that the perceived appropriateness of the setting determines how willing people are to accept an attempt to initiate a relationship, regardless of who the initiator is, how attractive they are, or how familiar they are. Five studies involving over a thousand participants confirmed that in places considered socially suitable for romantic approaches, the likelihood of success is significantly higher.

Context Matters: Why the Setting Is Important

Traditionally, research on anxiety disorders and other psychological states has focused on a person’s internal qualities or interpersonal interactions. However, the authors of the study, Katie N. Adams and Omri Gillath, set out to examine how the physical and social environment influences the perception of romantic advances. Their goal was to understand how different locations—be it a bar, a workplace, or even a funeral—shape responses to flirtatious attempts. Previous research has shown that context influences behavior perception, but the role of the setting in romantic initiatives has been insufficiently studied. The researchers aimed to fill this gap by analyzing which places people consider appropriate for romantic contacts, and how these places interact with factors such as attractiveness, familiarity, and type of proposal.

How the Study Was Conducted

Stage 1: Identifying Appropriate and Inappropriate Places

In the first study (Study 1a), 35 participants were asked to list places they considered appropriate or inappropriate for romantic initiatives. Responses ranged from expected venues, such as dating apps and bars, to less obvious ones like grocery stores or public transportation. Based on these answers, the researchers compiled a list of 48 different locations. In the next study (Study 1b), 162 participants rated the appropriateness of each of these locations for romantic approaches on a five-point scale. The places were divided into three categories:

• High appropriateness: dating apps, bars, private homes.
• Medium appropriateness: gyms, online gaming, the street.
• Low appropriateness: workplaces, doctor’s offices, funerals.

Stages 2–4: Experiments with Different Variables

The main experiment consisted of three parts (Studies 2a–2c), each examining the effect of setting appropriateness on the success of a romantic advance. In each study, one additional variable was manipulated:

• Attractiveness of the initiator (Study 2a).
• Familiarity with the initiator (Study 2b).
• Type of proposal (Study 2c).

Participants were asked to imagine hypothetical scenarios in which someone showed romantic interest in them in one of the selected locations and to rate how likely they would be to accept the advance.

Study 2a: Effect of Attractiveness

Participants read descriptions in which either an attractive or unattractive person initiated contact in one of 12 locations. Although attractiveness increased the probability of a positive response, this effect depended on the setting. In highly appropriate places, such as bars, attractive initiators had a higher chance of success, but in inappropriate places, such as doctor’s offices or funerals, this advantage disappeared.

Study 2b: Role of Familiarity

Participants imagined being approached by either a close friend of the opposite sex or a stranger. Familiarity had a moderate influence but also depended on the setting. For example, in inappropriate places, familiar initiators received less positive feedback, possibly because participants expected them to choose a better time and place. Women reacted less positively than men to advances from familiar initiators, which may relate to perceptions of boundary violations in friendship.

Study 2c: Type of Romantic Proposal

Participants read scenarios where the initiator suggested either dinner (a less sexual proposal) or a visit to their home (a more explicit proposal). Again, setting appropriateness was the key factor. Participants were more willing to accept any proposal in appropriate places. However, women showed a clear preference for less sexual proposals in all settings, especially avoiding explicit proposals in inappropriate contexts. Men also showed decreased willingness to accept advances in inappropriate places, particularly for explicit proposals.

Key Findings

In all three experiments, setting appropriateness emerged as the most significant factor, often outweighing the influence of attractiveness, familiarity, or type of proposal. People use the surrounding environment as a guide to interpret romantic advances. Social scenarios and cultural norms determine which actions are considered acceptable in different places. For example, flirting in a nightclub is seen as normal, whereas doing so in a doctor’s office may seem intrusive or inappropriate.

Limitations and Future Directions

The study has several limitations. First, it relies on hypothetical scenarios, which may not fully reflect real behavior. Second, attractiveness was described textually rather than visually, which might have affected perceptions. Participants were predominantly from the US (university students and Amazon Mechanical Turk users), limiting the generalizability of the results to other cultures. Future research could use virtual reality to create more realistic scenarios or conduct field observations. It would also be worthwhile to examine other environmental factors, such as noise level, crowd density, or the presence of bystanders.

Conclusion

The study “Environmental Appropriateness and the Success of Romantic Initiatives,” published on March 18, 2024, highlights the importance of choosing the right setting for romantic attempts. Regardless of how attractive you are or how well you know the person, an inappropriate environment can minimize your chances of success. If you want to improve your odds for romantic success, choose your venue wisely—a bar or a dating app can be far more effective than an office or a funeral.```